I decided that crime blotters are fair game for The Sac Rag. Here is a gem from the CSUS log:

September 16
Theft – LIBRARY – A man reported that upon returning to the bike he’d locked to the bike rack at 9:30 a.m., he found that someone had opened the lock and replaced his new bike with an old bike.

The same thing happened to my car once. Oh right, like a guy as important as CoolDMZ really drove a Mazda. Come on!