by 
(NOTE: This is post #1000!! -Ed.)
Breaking Story: It has come to the attention of the editorial staff at sacrag.com that the Java City in Loehman’s plaza has closed. That’s right, the perennial hangout for the Armenian, Greek and Russian organized crime lackeys in this town has closed.
How could this happen, you ask? Well, those of us in the gustatory press might say that it was long overdue, since Java City’s coffee tastes like monkey piss mixed with coagulated blood. But, the word from my source across the road at Peet’s is that there were problems with “the lease.”
Nevertheless, this means double the traffic at the Lyon’s center Peet’s, which may make some alterations necessary. On the bright side, my reliable source (Michael) says that the space formerly occupied by JC will now be a branch of the venerable San Francisco institution, Boudin Bakery Cafe. I know, awesome, isn’t it? I’m looking forward to that chowder in a breadbowl-as long as it doesn’t taste like monkey piss.
40 Comments
am i wrong or isn’t peet’s a fancy starbucks…meaning they are owned and operated by the starbucks corp? being a veteran of both starbucks and java city i can assure you it’s not monkey piss…it’s cat piss..and i’ll tell you why. recent bans in the shipping of monkey related by products has forced coffee companies to use cat and dog piss in their stead. being that sacramento has a super high rate of stray cats…that’s what we get. see you in line for our bi-hourly frapuccino!
January 28th, 2007 at 11:54 am
Bite your tongue, Talkingpocket!
Although Peet’s Coffee & Tea has a connection to Starbucks, it’s not via ownership (currently, at least):
I did enjoy me a Javalanche from time to time. We’ll be sure to monitor the organized crime trends in the area now that JC is no more.
January 28th, 2007 at 12:04 pm
One of the cofounders of Starbucks wanted to name it Pequod — named after the ship in his favorite book, Moby Dick.
January 29th, 2007 at 8:56 am
ACK, this is runnergirl, and my comment above got posted as sac-eats again. Note to reader: I’m the one who makes the dorky Cliff Claven-esque comments, while the wit is left in the more able hands of sac-eats.
January 29th, 2007 at 8:57 am
OK I haven’t watched yet, but I was secretly hoping I had misread the title of the episode. Ugh. Why not just call it “The One Where Apollo and Dee Break Up”? (a la “Friends”)
January 29th, 2007 at 10:03 am
Inquiring minds want to know — what are you guys talking about?
January 29th, 2007 at 11:21 am
Battlestar Galactica
January 29th, 2007 at 11:54 am
Yes, according to IMDB, Lorne Greene passed in 1987 at the age of 72 (that’s 504 in dog years!)
January 29th, 2007 at 12:53 pm
I always wish it could have worked out that someday this new iteration would be known as “the one with Paul Campbell.” Oh, Billy!!
January 29th, 2007 at 1:32 pm
My favorite Battlestar episode was when the aliens from the planet Threadcreepion invaded the City of Java killing off the locals thereby destroying documentation of the history of the city and its founder, Saceatsada…
January 29th, 2007 at 2:15 pm
don’t you mean the one where Tobias discovers that George Sr. has been living in the attic?
January 29th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
Why don’t they just open a banana stand in the Java City location?
January 29th, 2007 at 3:25 pm
Monkey piss. That is exactly how it tasted but I couldn’t put my finger on it, and wouldn’t want to.
I like anything in a breadbowl..maybe even cat or money piss (as long as there is enough cornstarch added):)
January 29th, 2007 at 3:42 pm
I meant monkey piss, not money piss..but that works too.
January 29th, 2007 at 3:43 pm
a) the Merrimint Javalanche owns all of you.
b) being that I am in midtown I still have two Java City establishments within walking distance.
c) Lee Adama did not break up with Dee.
January 30th, 2007 at 12:19 pm
d) Do runnergirl and sac-eats cohabitate?!
January 30th, 2007 at 12:20 pm
Kit, we actually didn’t officially live together until a few weeks after our wedding! So, if you’d have asked that last April/May, our answer could have honestly been “no, we don’t cohabitate.”
Hopefully I’m not blowing the lid off any closely guarded SacRag secrets by publicly acknowledging that my main squeeze, DH, life path partner, whatever you want to call it, is indeed Sac-Eats. Consider this my Doug Christie-esque way of showing my affection online: >^..^
January 30th, 2007 at 12:44 pm
Darn it! My kitty emoticon didn’t come out right. Let’s try that again: >^..^
January 30th, 2007 at 12:46 pm
kit: why’d you do it. I still haven’t watched. why, man.
January 30th, 2007 at 1:01 pm
Good-time, you live in midtown?!? I never would have guessed that. Blows my mind.
January 30th, 2007 at 1:04 pm
Who’s Lee Adama? I always thought Dee would be a good match for Dwayne (definitely not ReRun.) I’d have loved to have seen Rog and Shirl get together too.
January 30th, 2007 at 1:07 pm
Eeek. Okay I definitely did not intend to spoil your Battlestar experience. There’s a lot more to that episode anyway…
So wow, I had no idea you two just got married last year. Got any plans for the one year anniversary? We did ours in Carmel.
January 31st, 2007 at 10:38 am
“Way to go!” to Sac-Eats who totally scooped the Bee on this story. He reported it on Saturday, while it just hit today’s Bee in Bob Shallit’s column.
Kit, to answer your question about our one-year anniversary, we WERE planning on a romantic evening at Java City at Loehmann’s Plaza, but I guess that plan will need to be re-worked now.
January 31st, 2007 at 11:05 am
Shallit’s column also completely ignored the organized crime angle. I guess for hard-hitting local investigative journalism you have to come here or go to Kurtis Ming.
January 31st, 2007 at 1:02 pm
-and the monkey piss, Shallit totally avoids the monkey piss.
January 31st, 2007 at 3:30 pm
I want my props! I’m gonna have to step up here and say that I had at least a little something to do with this “breaking news”.
My evidence:
From: The Tenebrist
Sent: Saturday, January 27, 2007 10:22 PM
To: Bob Shallit
Subject: Boudin Bakery coming to Sacramento?
I’ve heard a rumor that a San Francisco-based Boudin Bakery is moving
into the space previously occupied by Java City inside the Loehmann’s
Plaza shopping center. Heard anything?
From: Bob Shallit
Sent: January 29, 2007 8:50:20 AM PST
To: The Tenebrist
Subject: Boudin Bakery coming to Sacramento?
I’ll check on that. I’d heard Boudin’s was going into the Fountains project in Roseville. Hadn’t heard about this one.
Bob
From: Bob Shallit
Sent: January 29, 2007 11:01:50 AM PST
To: The Tenebrist
Subject: Boudin Bakery coming to Sacramento?
I’m now hearing the same thing. Hope to track it down by the end of the
day. Thanks for the note.
Bob
Afterall, I was Sac-Eats’s “reliable source”!
February 1st, 2007 at 12:10 am
Welcome, Tenebrist, and thank you for being our own personal Mark Felt.
February 1st, 2007 at 7:31 am
Tenebrist: so you’re working both sides? so when Shallit’s gravy train is gone you can hitch on to ours? nuh uh.
just kidding, thanks!!
February 1st, 2007 at 9:54 am
aw, tenebrist.
It’s lovely meeting you here in cyberspace
hee hee
February 1st, 2007 at 1:39 pm
Does anyone know WHEN? the new Boudin Bakery will open up in Loehmann’s ?
March 7th, 2007 at 5:29 pm
I know when.
March 7th, 2007 at 7:28 pm
Sac-Eats… want to share with the rest of us? I know a few of us will want to be lined up at the front door when they open!
Please share the knowledge!
March 8th, 2007 at 12:37 pm
OK, I was lying. I have no idea. I was feeling impish and now I’ve hurt you.
Truth is, they don’t even know yet when they’ll be opening. No hiring has taken place and besides signage, no substantial construction is going on indoors. So, in my eatery timetable expert opinion, I’d say we’re looking to June at the earliest for an opening at Boudin.
March 8th, 2007 at 1:35 pm
Who is June? Does she know when?
March 8th, 2007 at 3:34 pm
Yeah, she thinks it’ll open in June. What a coincidence. Her friend April thinks it will open in August.
March 8th, 2007 at 4:02 pm
Free Coffee Celebrates Java City’s “Rebirth“:
Woohoo! Welcome back, Java City…
April 2nd, 2007 at 11:59 am
I keep driving by there to see if an opening date has been posted yet, but nothing so far, *so sad*..Has anyone else heard of an opening date for the Boudin SF cafe in Loehmann’s yet?
August 31st, 2007 at 8:58 am
I heard that it will open in June.
August 31st, 2007 at 9:25 am
Yeah, this is part of the “Better Late Than Never” series. (Okay, I’m a newbie stuck out here in Folsom, where fun is going to the Kinko’s on Riley, or maybe the Wendy’s, and am reading all your cogent archival posts dating back to the early 1920’s, including the ones cruelly lambasting Dorothy Parker for her taste in men.)
“runnergirl said on 01/29/07 at 3:25 PM (link):
Why don’t they just open a banana stand in the Java City location?”
And no one caught her “Arrested Development” reference? For shame!
December 30th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
A ha! Another AD fan — I knew I liked you, NMB!
December 30th, 2007 at 4:52 pm
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