The LA institution affectionately known as Crack-berry is coming to our small hamlet. Soon to open at Howe ’bout Arden, with additional locations in the usual suburban enclaves of Roseville, Folsom, and Elk Grove, the SoCal institution will bring its tangy yogurt and fresh fruit toppings and naive Japanese schoolgirl attitude and creepy trance music to town and nothing will be the same again. Mostly my waistline, which will expand exponentially with the consumption of original yogurt with kiwi.

Following the trend of many local businesses, the beloved Squeeze Inn has moved to the Quarry Pond Center in Granite Bay.  Ok, that’s not technically true, they actually moved a block away from their old joint and are now at 5301 Power Inn Rd.  From all reports it looks like they’ve tried to keep the old atmosphere alive by transplanting a lot of the folksy charm to the new location.  For me though, the most important thing is transplanting the grill. If it’s not the same grill, it’s not the same burger.

There will be further reporting once I’ve tucked into a new (and hopefully not improved) Squeeze with cheese in the next few days.

If there’s one thing the Press Club is not known for, it’s comedy; if there’s another, it’s jazz—yet both will be on display alongside one of Sacramento’s favorite bands, The Snobs, this Tuesday night at 9 p.m.

Comedian and host Noel Dewitt (who also happens to own one of Sacramento’s best salons,  Mirrors) will share the stage with an unlikely, but hard-not-to-like lineup of comedian John Ross, comedy jazz duo The Freebadge Serenaders (don’t be surprised if one of the members of the Serenaders looks surprisingly like me), and The Snobs.

The cover charge is a paltry $3, and drink specials will be flowing all night. Come on by for some toe-tappin’, belly-bustin’ good times.

Press Club, 9PM, $3- 2030 P St

Reader help is requested to give me a better idea as to what is happening on the corner of 16th and R. At the beginning of the month, a small restaurant opened up called Shabu: Japanese Fondue.  Now the only thing I know about shabu-shabu is what I learned on the interwebs (which is a series of tubes dontchaknow).  Here’s what I’ve gleaned from the the usual sources: shabu-shabu is style of cuisine in which the diner cooks small bits of meat and vegetable in a communal bowl of steaming broth; this broth is then consumed at the end of the meal.

All I can say is “Thank God.” I was a bit worried that we were expected to mix teriyaki with a brandy spiked cheese sauce, or dipping slivers of yellowtail into molten chocolate. 

So, has anyone had shabu-shabu before? Anyone actually eaten at the new Shabu restaurant yet? Anyone turning Japanese?  Let us know.

There are three things I love about tonight’s “Snowfall” party at the Shady Lady: 1) It’s free, 2) There will be punchbowls of mulled wine, and 3) Cocktail or festive dress is preferred.  Those are, pretty much in order, my top three requirements of a holiday party.

Drop by and sip on a hot toddy and maybe I’ll see you there.

The Shady Lady Saloon- 1409 R St, Sacramento (click here for more details)

I’m still not comfortable with the name, but I’ve become quite a fan of their food. 

In one word: mussels. Plan B Cafe in Arden Town Center knows how to do mussels. With coconut broth, or spicy cilantro broth, or white wine and garlic, or tomato sauce (or as my Nana would say, “tomato gravy”) with herbes de provence, these folks know how to serve up some bivalves.  The rest of the menu ain’t too shabby either, a bit expensive, but delicious and elegant enough to warrant most of the price. The mussels, however, are a steal at $12 (and extra $3 for fries, but trust me, you need the fries).

One of the more whimsical thoughts is that the space Plan B occupies used to be a toy store. I don’t know what that has to do with anything, I just think it’s kind of funny.

Try the desserts, especially anything with a crust — tarte tarin, pear tartlette, anything gallette — but stay away from the bread they bring to the table.  Someone in the kitchen is obviously a talented pastry chef, but not much of a bread maker.

Plan B Cafe- Watt & Fair Oaks in Arden Town Center, Sacramento

Foo ***1/2 Ambiance *** Service ****

This Friday at the Center for Sacramento History, you too can be frightened out of your wits by the hoary spectre of COMMUNISM! Starting at 6pm, with lectures at 7:30, you can take a stroll down memory lane to 1935, when our civic forefathers tried over a dozen farm labor unionists for trying to overthrow the government.  Good times, good times.  Refreshments may or may not be served, but if anyone over there has a sense of humor they’ll serve red wine…or vodka shots.  Check out the CSH website for more details.

It wasn’t my choice, really. I had to eat at Ernesto’s today. I had fallen into a gaggle of Ernesto’s gift certificates and needed to spend them. What was I supposed to do? Let them go to waste? Give them to friends?  What kind of punkass friend gives his buddy a gift certificate to a shitty restaurant?

Not me. I had to choke it down myself, and choke it down I did.

Ok, to be fair, Ernesto’s food is not horrible. It won’t give you a ride on the “vomit comet” or the “anal egress express” but it will leave you with a serious sense of “edible amnesia.” Edible amnesia is the condition that occurs when the food that you eat is so bland and uninteresting that you can’t even remember eating it. And that’s where Ernesto’s fits it. It’s Mexican food for people from Slovakia. It has zero flavor, no passion, and  a serious lack of oomph, in fact no oomph whatsoever. It’s like someone back in the kitchen is treating corn starch as a spice.  The sauces are weak and flavorless, the meats bland, and the soups waifish. Yeah I said waifish.

So, just in case you were wondering, Ernesto’s is still not anyplace you’d want to go if eating was your goal. Margaritas aren’t bad though.

I’ll admit, I’ve never seen Brent Weinbach perform. But I’ll totally pimp him anyway. Why? Because a lot of comedians I know say that this guy is hilarious. If you get that kind of praise by other comedians, it means that you’ve got a funny act that is something special, something different, and something probably fairly offensive. Sounds good to me. Performing with Brent will be a few of Sacramento’s best comics, so come out Saturday at 8pm to the new Sacramento Comedy Spot at 20th and J streets. (That’s correct, right on the midtown ice rink.) Tix are only $10.
Check out www.saccomedyspot.com for details.