Slow News Day?

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Today's breaking news: holiday parking sucks!

I actually own a newspaper subscription. This morning, I paid for the privilege of reading the following “news,” which appeared on the FRONT page of the Bee:


The story came complete with “parking tactics for holiday shoppers.”

In an effort to help our friends at the Bee with some additional news items, I have created the following list of future stories:

  • Shocking Discovery on Sacramento Streets: Cars Stopping at Stop Signs
  • Scientific Research Shows: American River Water is “Wet”
  • Sacramento Holiday Shoppers Set Trend by Paying in U.S. Dollars
  • Sacramento Mother Tells 20-Year-Old Son: “Santa Not Real”
  • Area Nonprofits Make Radical Announcement: “We Need Money”

About GreenBeet

Nonprofit fundraiser by day; book-reading fiend by night; plant-hugging backyard farmer early in the morning: this is GreenBeet. I still play with crayons because I love colors. Green, like the planet, is my favorite. Art makes me smile. I get giddy with glee over seed catalogs. Attempts at reducing my environmental footprint offer adventure in my world. I can only afford to own it if I find it at the local thrift store, and by golly, I love a good thrift store. Sacramento, get ready to green it up GreenBeet style! Let the fun begin!

2 Responses to Slow News Day?

  1. Rob says:

    My favorite part of that story was the photo of the usual Arden Fair parking situation strategically angled to make it look like a huge crowd or something.

  2. Turty_Squip says:

    It’s all jut hype for their contest, to be announced tomorrow: “P for a Parking Space.”