Kings assistant coach arrested on DUI charges

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OK, what’s the deal? Kings assistant coach, Mario Elie, was arrested for driving under the influence early this morning. Granted, you’d celebrate, too, if your team won a game after sporting the league’s worst record.

“We are very concerned and disappointed in regard to Mario’s arrest for DUI. This is an ugly form of history repeating itself. We expect better, knowing at the same time there are limits to how far you can go to protect people from themselves. In spite of all of this, we still respect Mario’s right to due process,” said Kings’ President of Basketball Operations Geoff Petrie.

Man, Geoff must be simply swapping out the names each time with these statements. I did enjoy the line about protecting people from themselves. That’s good stuff.

The last few Kings players/coaches who have been arrested are no longer with the team. If the phone rings, Mario, don’t answer it!

Is it Sacramento? Is it professional sports? Is it professional sports in Sacramento?

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2 Responses to Kings assistant coach arrested on DUI charges

  1. Moe Hong says:

    The Maloofs only like to hire staff and players that they meet in their casino bars.

  2. Sarah says:

    If you were asking about someone on a normal income, the answer would be “It’s Sacramento,” because our public transit system is a joke, cabs cost as much as renting a limo and the urban sprawl is fucking terrible. However, when you’re asking about someone that makes NBA money, the answer has to be that this person is just a gigantic drooling IDIOT for driving his own car when he could have probably afforded an entire fleet of town cars to follow him around from bar to bar…