The local version of Maury and Connie, KCRA’s Dave Walker and Lois Hart are stepping down from the 11 p.m. news later this year. Dave and Lois are definitely my favorite local broadcasting team (can you say, If you don’t like that, you don’t like local sports radio idiots?) and will be sorely missed in the CoolDMZ household, where the flirtatious “active adult” couple was a heartwarming part of the nightly local news gathering ritual. Although at their age, it was pretty obvious that most nights they needed to be in bed by 11.

They will be replaced at 11 by Edie Lambert and John Alston, who are competent newspeople but will have the chemistry of a pair of candlesticks. What good is hokey local news (lokey news? hokal news?) without a cute old married couple telling you about the Asparagus Festival?

Finally, what we’ve all been waiting for: the launch of Your Cowtown. For weeks Sacramentans have wondered what online wonders the new site would present, then we played the cow-tipping game until we were masters (though I could never get past 1 cow until it timed out. What the dealio?). Now we have the full site, and all our questions are answered. In what is absolutely the biggest shocker since the Webber trade, the site is brought to us by…the Maloofs? KCRA? the Money Store? Sony? Sorry, it’s Crystal Dairy!

The site features the classic “Cow Tippin” game, a link out to Crystal Cream & Butter Company’s site, a tool for getting home delivery of dairy products (welcome to the 1950s!), a retail locator, and the two strangest things I’ve seen in a long time: a call for “columnists” (on a dairy producer’s site?) and a “Create a Blog” feature which is actually just a guestbook. What’s next, a screen of brain-hemorrage inducing dancing cows?

Don’t get me wrong: I loves me some Crystal products. For your money, Crystal ice cream is the way to go, unless you want high-quality ice cream in nice-looking packaging that doesn’t fall apart when touched. But seriously. Great milk, top-notch. And now a great website to boot!