Friends, I’ve taken the liberty of creating a new category (did I need CoolDMZ permission for this?) to house my records of bizarre commuting experiences. For example, conversations overheard on the light rail. For example of that, the following: At 7:30 a.m. a completely wasted woman sitting behind me had the following to say on her cell phone: “I’m going to go to Folsom and get me some new KSwiss as soon as it does…. he said he want a baby, that dumb F-**ker don’t even know that he’ll be lucky if he gets to eat dinner at home tonight and he thinks I’m gonna give him a baby…” Rinse, lather, repeat for my entire morning commute. And for yet another example,
something that could probably be a category unto its own, consider the numerous people who like to try out their new raps for the captive audience of downtown commuters. Overheard two days ago: “You heard about the pot calling the kettle black, but this is the black skillet calling the black pot black…” What? Isn’t the point of the original phrase that the pot is also black? And also isn’t the point of rap that it’s supposed to have some kind of rhythm? This particular rapper was the same man who later explained to his companion that when martial law takes over, as it soon will, the light rail police won’t have any jurisdiction and we’ll all run wild on the light rail. Apparantly someone has gotten a few too many light rail tickets. More on the light rail police later.
And as a final example sure to repeat, there are the MANY evangelists of many denominations who pass out religious tracts on the rails. If you don’t take one, they usually pray for you. Not hostile, but it can feel a bit awkward. I’m not sure what happens if you do take one. One time I told a man that I already had a Bible and thanks but I had it covered, but he apparantly thought I was mocking him and then he prayed beside me extra earnestly. Then, to make it clear that I was serious and not making fun of him, I smiled at him when he finished, which only made me seem really weird and possibly psycho. Not sure what the right ettiquite there is. Anyway, anyone have commuting tales to share?