I actually own a newspaper subscription. This morning, I paid for the privilege of reading the following “news,” which appeared on the FRONT page of the Bee:
The story came complete with “parking tactics for holiday shoppers.”
In an effort to help our friends at the Bee with some additional news items, I have created the following list of future stories:
- Shocking Discovery on Sacramento Streets: Cars Stopping at Stop Signs
- Scientific Research Shows: American River Water is “Wet”
- Sacramento Holiday Shoppers Set Trend by Paying in U.S. Dollars
- Sacramento Mother Tells 20-Year-Old Son: “Santa Not Real”
- Area Nonprofits Make Radical Announcement: “We Need Money”
The Sac Rag 
My favorite part of that story was the photo of the usual Arden Fair parking situation strategically angled to make it look like a huge crowd or something.
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It’s all jut hype for their contest, to be announced tomorrow: “P for a Parking Space.”
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