The Bee reports today that Power Balance, the company that lent its name to the building in which the Kings aren’t playing, filed for bankruptcy. Apparently a court found that their bracelets don’t do much more than sit unattractively on your wrist, leading to a class action suit in which the company was liable for the $30 plus $5 s/h for every single person that bought one of the useless pieces of jewelry.
Now I’m not sure what this says about the Kings/Maloofs/city of Sacramento/Federal Reserve Bank, but I do know what it says about stepping up your athletic performance: equipment is rarely the answer.
The Sac Rag 
This is so awesome it’s not even awesome.
Next thing you know they will change the name of Sports 1140 KHTK!
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I love tbe quote from the Kings spokesman Clark that Power Balance will “continue inovation in the performance technology sector”.
Every word in that quote is a lie, except for “in the”.
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You Seinfeld fans may think that quote sounds familiar…
Kramer: Dean Jones, you wanting to talk to me?
Dean Jones: I’ve been reviewing Darren’s internship journal. Doing laundry…
Kramer: …Yeah.
Dean Jones: …Mending chicken wire, hi-tea with a Mr. Newman.
Kramer: I know it sounds pretty glamorous, but it’s business as usual at Kramerica.
Dean Jones: As far as I can tell your entire enterprise is more than a solitary man with a messy apartment which may or may not contain a chicken.
Kramer: And with Darren’s help, we’ll get that chicken.
Dean Jones: I’m sorry, but we can’t allow Darren to continue working with you.
Kramer: Well, I have to say this seems capricious and arbitrary.
Dean Jones: Your fly is open.
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Good. I’m sure it was well deserved. As I understand it, Australian skeptics put those frauds out of business in their country.
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In Australia the magnets work backwards, so of COURSE the bands wouldn’t work there. In fact, they’d make you lean MORE. You have to wear the bands backwards to reverse the polarity to compensate for the abundance of negative electrons in the southern (negative) hemisphere. Anyone who has flushed toilets* in both hemispheres can tell your that.
As long as the Area (/Pavilion) got the money up front I don’t care. If they didn’t, is Sacramento now obligated to go with the 2nd place bidder of “Krappy Team Krispy Kreme Koncert Hall”?
* Speaking of equipment: Or has worn the Power Balance (R) (TM) (C) Thingy on … errr… their uhh… “member” in both hemispheres (I understand- not that there is anything wrong with that) can attest.
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I didn’t realize Australians were such dipshits that they need federal government intervention to protect themselves from wasting money on magnetic wristbands.
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I don’t think it’s that the nation is made up of dipshits, but like any nation, there may be many living within its borders.
I think they were more worried about people foregoing medical treatment for serious diseases and instead relying on the promises of useless magnets, homeopathic “medicines,” etc.
There’s no reason to allow that kind of garbage in pharmacies. I am mostly a civil libertarian, but I do think this is a good use of government oversight and regulation.
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