The Fresher the Avocadoes…

mmm…avocadoesWe have a bit of a penchant here at the ‘Rag for discussing what makes Sacramento…well, Sacramento. How is it different than other cities? What gives it its unique Sacramentoness? What makes the people constantly run into buildings with their cars?

After traveling the country, talking with its various inhabitants and doing my fair share of research, I’ve found that there are two things that separate Sacramento from the rest: the weather, and the freshness of the avocadoes. That’s about it. Those two factors are, in fact, really the only things that separate any mid-size American city from any other mid-size American city.

There are only about 12-15 truly unique American cities anymore, cities that have unique histories, culture, food, theater, entertainment, music, people, populations. You know all these cities already, New York, New Orleans, Miami, San Francisco-I’ll let you fill in the rest of the list. After you’re done with that list, you’re left with media markets 16-100 and you’ll find that these cities have much more in common than you might have thought. Boise, Omaha, San Antonio, Tempe, Santa Fe, Fresno, Eugene, Spokane, Cincinnati, Harrisburg, Albany, Raleigh, Okalahoma City all have the same issues with rebuilding their downtowns, with increased traffic, with sprawl, with politicians, with too many chain restaurants. They all have “Old Towns,” malls, civil servants, Stan Atkinsons, Heather Fargos and Cap’n Mitches. What really separates these cities is their weather (i.e. I have no idea how to shovel a driveway, salt a road, etc.) and the freshness of the produce (try getting strawberries in Lansing in November). Oh, I forgot one thing, the people, not the big anonymous “people” but the people you know, your friends, family, and everyone that makes your day different. Those people make the city you live in different than any other place on Earth, which is why I love Sacramento more than any other mid-sized American city. So next time you get offered a promotion at work, but the boss tells you you’ll have to move to Columbus, or Minneapolis for a 10% pay raise, think about the weather and the folks that you can’t take with you and see if that doesn’t color your decision. That, and of course the avocadoes.

8 thoughts on “The Fresher the Avocadoes…”

  1. Can I add that I love “dry heat.” Yes Sacto may get to 110 degrees but it is a “dry heat.” Well it is not that I love “dry” it is that I hate humidity.


  2. Let’s not forget highway numbers – such as Sac’s having two highways named “80” and two “99” highways that aren’t actually directly connected.


  3. Spokane.


    Let me tell you, Spokane is like no other city on earth. It’s “resting on the laurels of Expo ’74.” It’s “Spo-Vegas”, “Spok-a-loo”, and the most freaking white-bread city you’ll ever hope to meet.

    In other words, it has a very distinct flavor, and that flavor is “Oh well, we tried.” Sometimes it’s even “Oh well, we tried and we failed.” Drove me nuts.

    I do not hate Spokane, but sometimes dealing with it was like dealing with an idiot co-worker who’s nice, really, but who needs to grow some backbone already.


  4. And incidentally, Spokane and Eugene are anything but indistinguishable. Eugene is where the Berkeley hippies went when Berkeley got too upscale. The question there is not “Do you smoke pot?” it’s “Where did you smoke pot?”

    In Eugene, I saw a man with a cat on his head, a bike-riding mandolin player, a person living in an aluminum-coated trailer on the back of his bike, and your usual run of hippies. There’s an anarchist on the city council…


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