Author: CoolDMZ

"X-ray vision to see in between / Where's my kimono and my time machine?"

Take that, evil donut empire

To get everybody in the mood for irresponsible eating, I’d like to bring your attention to this story about a hole in the wall donut shop at Watt & Arden staying put while the Krispy Kreme next door closes its doors.

I have always felt that the Krispy Kreme Emperor’s new clothes were nonexistent. When I call up the image of “Donut” in my mind, what I picture is what Mike Teselle is holding up in the KCRA video clip, not that teeny undercooked runt of a pastry. Looks like I was not alone in this, as the little guy clearly triumphed here.

They Say the Neon Lights Are Bright

As much as I’d like to mock his decision to take his one-man crusade to rid this country of Judeo-Christian God references to the stage in his hometown of Elk Grove, Michael Newdow probably made the right choice. How else are people who just aren’t politically and/or religiously motivated to agree or disagree with him going to have an opinion about him, if he doesn’t buy out a high school theater and show what an idiot he is through song and dance?

I keep reading, as in today’s recap of the musical even in the Bee, that Michael Newdow is a smart man. In his own words, his musical revue was meant to educate the public about the Constitution, but he just seems to me like a guy with a middle school education. Something about Newdow really brings out the snob in me. For example, when I hear him talking about the Constitution and Democracy I can’t help but remember the words of a 10 year old I tutored in the fall of 2000, who told me that Al Gore should be president over George W. Bush because Gore was vice president, and vice president was higher than governor.
Continue reading “They Say the Neon Lights Are Bright”

Do you believe the statue is crying real blood?

Just in time for the holidays, a local statue of the Virgin Mary has begun crying tears of blood. Because parishoners at first suspected the work of local hooligans, the on top of it parish priest wiped the tears clean, only to see them reappear over the weekend. And since hoodlums and other assorted toughs usually take the weekends off, that settles that question.

Make sure to head right on over to CBS 13/UPN 31’s page and, without experiencing the statue for yourself, vote in their handy online poll, “Do you believe the statue is crying real blood?” Because whatever the situation is, the only important thing is whether Web site viewers believe it or not.

Sheriff Abuse Scandal Rocks Alternative Press

Everybody’s hoppin mad about county jail abuse and the sheriff’s department’s refusal to talk to reporters from the SNR and the Bee. Heckasac’s comments about Shornack and Mendonsa are particularly well-played.

I usually don’t have a comment about these sorts of issues. Maybe because you tend to get quotes like this one from local NAACP President Betty Williams: “In my opinion, these two newspapers are the newest ‘inmates’ of the Sacramento County Jail.” Ouch. So I’ll just say two things. First, it is unfortunate that this problem seems to have started when the Bee made factual errors in its news reports. When we at the Sac Rag condemn a public official, we promise to have either photographic evidence or nothing more than a hunch, nothing in between, and in neither case will we publish a correction.

And second of all, shouldn’t the sheriff be the one guy in town who doesn’t act all diva when he gets negative press? Just make like Gary Cooper and tell us that some dudes just need to get a beat down, Lou. Make us understand.

More Love for the Spot

SNR has a big music feature on Daisy Spot in the current issue. Local rock god Mike Farrell is very frank about drug use and its involvement in the creative process. Kudos for that.

But my favorite detail in the piece is that the record is produced by “longtime fan Dana Gumbiner” of Deathray and LGS and that he took to this role because “he realized it might be the only way he’d ever have the Daisy Spot album he’d long desired.” This seems like a classic Sacramento detail, and I don’t mean that in the usual self-deprecating sense that I usually intend. It’s kind of like starting a Web site to talk about Coffee Works (err, I mean, so that some anonymous person might write a comment about Coffee Works) mainly because you want to read a Web site with anonymous comments about Coffee Works.

Oh, and new drummer Alex Jenkins was in my extended group of friends when I was 8 and now he lives 1 block over from me. Small town indeed.

Tina’s Thoughts

If you’ve lived in Sacramento for a long time, Tina Macuha is one of those local media people, like Stan Atkinson or that Australian guy on KWOD, whose voice and/or image gives you that warm and fuzzy feeling, like Sacramento is a thick wool blanket, smothering the very life out of you. Tina’s current haunt is the traffic desk at Good Day, where every morning she posts an Oprah-esque quote, fresh from the HP Laserjet (today’s was “Feed Your Soul” or something). Her “Sign of the Day,” I see it’s called as I read her bio.

My gut reaction is annoyance, because so often the phrase makes no sense or gives helpful advice only for someone who had just recently said to themselves, “you know, what my life really needs right now is a pat answer to a question I wasn’t asking.” But then the Sacto homer in me kicks in, and I wonder why she has to resort to printing these things up herself and littering her little workspace with them. From the morning show on FM 102 back in the 80s to being an original “Good Day” host, Tina Macuha owns this town. Couldn’t they maybe spare a nice plaque or frame or something? Maybe a graphic?

Vlade Flopper, Not Fighter

As hinted at by sac-eats and as posted by the ever alert and still not creatively paralyzed DB at The Barnesyard, former Sacramento Kings beloved center Vlade Divac is wanted in his home country of Serbia-Montenegro for draft evasion (or “avoison,” one of my favorite neologisms). Yeah, being wanted in Serbia-Montenegro does not sound like something you would wish on a person.

UPDATE: Offensive foul!!

UPDATE II: a half a second after finding this out, Mr. Divac fell to the ground inexplicably.