Local duo cleverly protects their identity

We need teepee for our bungholes!
Don’t you stare at my belly button!

We see stories like this quite often. But, this particular one struck me as unique. Why? Well, there was something about the two dudes that reminded me of something. Something from my college days. What was it though? What was it about these two brainiacs holding up a pizza joint that seemed so familiar?

Then it hit me. That’s it! Answer after the jump…
Continue reading “Local duo cleverly protects their identity”

We need a proposition for this one

News10.net reports that an all-women facility of the California Family Fitness chain of gymnasiums will be forced to open its doors to men due to threat of litigation.

California Family Fitness operates 14 other gyms for both men and women, but kept its Howe Avenue location single-sex because it grew out of a nearby women’s health club known as Living Well Lady purchased by the company in 1997.

The company said it has also modified seven other locations that had separate workout areas for men and women.

I tell you what, these are wacky times we live in. Curves anyone?

UFO story brings us back

Remember when things were going so well in this country that we cared about space exploration and whether or not we were alone in the universe? This UFO story in Sacramento should help you recall those memories of old.

Plus, this story is one of the few examples of the comments feature being used less annoyingly by “news” organizations. They read like a story. A real page turner…

So, please to enjoy. And, if you’re like me, you can’t help but remember that episode of The Brady Bunch where Greg plays a joke on the gang by fabricating his own UFO.

The proposition 8 my homework

It’s NOT just us. We now have evidence that Sacto’s kids are, in fact, getting dumber. The Sacramento Business Journal reported earlier this week:

High school graduation rates are falling and fewer teens are meeting requirements to get into University of California and California State University schools in Sacramento County.

Those are among the many findings of the 2008 Sacramento County Children’s Report Card, according to a report to be presented Tuesday to the Sacramento County Board of Supervisors…

…Among its education findings, the group reports that the graduation rate among high school seniors decreased to 79.6 percent in 2006-07, from 85.1 percent in 2000-01.

The “group” in question is the Sacramento County Children’s Coalition, and they also reported on several other interesting damn lies statistics:

• High school drop outs earn an average of $21,346 a year, while graduates earn an average of $8,747 more.
• Those with a bachelor’s degree earn more than $21,000 annually more than people who have only a high school diploma.
• Spending per student in Sacramento County in 2005-06 was $7,324, compared to the state average of $8,486 and the national average of $9,138.

Who thinks this will get worse before it gets better? Perhaps it’s time to give education its rightful props on the voting ballot.

Because the art books kept going missing

The Sac library system wants to put butts in the seats by allowing butts on their computer screens:

Sacramento, Apr 29, 2008 / 09:23 pm (CNA).- The Sacramento Library Authority Board voted last Thursday to retain its policy of minimal interference with patrons who access pornography on library computers, News10 Sacramento reports. Board members also voted to spend $21,000 for more computer monitors with recessed screens to allow more private viewing.

Recessed screens? How about just set up a whole private booth complete with neon lights?

Board member Robbie Waters explained his support for $21,000 for more private computer screens, saying he wanted people to be able to exercise their right to be able to view whatever they would like. “It allows the screen to come right up at you and nobody can look over your shoulders,” Waters said.

This might be one of the most ridiculous decisions made by a public library that I’ve ever seen. Is perversion not pervasive enough, that now parents can’t take their kids to Sacramento’s libraries unsupervised?

And, just one request to you commenters. Please refrain from commenting on the “exercise their right” or “allows the scene to come right up at you”. It’s a little too obvious, even for the Sac Rag.

People Helping People

Who else gets mistaken for employees in retail establishments or is frequently asked by fellow patrons for assistance?

I know not to wear red garments when going to Target, and anyone who wore a blue chambray shirt and khakis in the ’90s* could have been mistaken for a Blockbuster employee.

Tonight at Longs, I helped a young girl pick out just the right microwave popcorn and a woman select a glittery hair clip for a friend’s 11-year-old daughter’s birthday. I was approached by each of these people — maybe they admired my taste in diet soda (all Coca Cola products are five 12-packs for $12, plus CRV; no coupon required) and laundry detergent, so they trusted my judgment to make consumer decisions for them. I truly felt like a Maven in Malcolm Gladwell’s eyes.

Does this happen to anyone else on a regular basis?

*Note the proper position of the apostrophe. The apostrophe indicates where I left off something that was already there, namely “19.” The incorrect way would have been to write it as “90’s.” For more information please refer to Grammar Girl’s guide to dates. As you were.