Nuts to all that!

Fox has a “fake news” comedy show called “The 1/2 Hour News Hour.” Haven’t seen it, can’t comment on its laugh-generating ability. But the show’s companion Web site OfficialNewsAgency.com has a winner with a very funny spoof of the mandatory neutering legislation (for pets, gentlemen! for pets!) recently shelved in the state Senate. (Update: The site isn’t associated with the show. I got that idea from their About page, which I now see has been changed to clearly show that they’re making fun of the Fox show, for people like me who are too dopey to get it. Ha!)

The story is being circulated all over the Internets as true, which is what spoof writers live for:

A marble monument to service dogs, originally set to be displayed in Sacramento, California, may be on its way out of the golden state. The reason? The statue’s “manhood” is still intact.

Proponents of the recently-tabled state assembly bill AB-1634, the so-called “California Healthy Pets Act”, which would require that most of the state’s dogs and cats over the age of 6 months be sterilized, claim that placing the image of an intact male dog on public property is harmful and sends the wrong message to California pet owners.

“Its not an appropriate display, in a state that carries out three million euthanasias a year.” said Dan Nender, a 1634 supporter who filed suit in Sacramento Federal Court to have the monument altered.

Pressed about the number, since most reputable sources set that number at 400,000, Nender replied, “One is too many. Concentrate on the point I’m making, not the numbers.”

Pretty good stuff, and very believable if you followed any of the heated rhetoric on both sides of the issue. (Which I very much did, like, um, full-time for weeks.)

Best part of all:

“As California government officials […] will attest to, Sacramento is a testicle-free zone.”

Well, OK, so maybe it’s not all a spoof. We are talking about a town full of politicians, after all.

World War Z: Where does Sac make its last stand?

zombiesHeyMeg brings up an excellent point today about inevitable zombie attack, one that deserves more than a passing mention. Also it’s Thursday and everybody needs a little pick-me-up on Thursday afternoon. For more clarification I turned to her husband, The Game Guy, who asks:

If Zombies attack, where’s the safest place in Sacramento to hide out/what’s the best escape route.

I mean, contemporary wisdom would say Arden Fair mall, but I don’t think that’s such a great idea – given its land-locked location, and close proximity to soon-to-be jammed freeways.

And K Street Mall is looks like its basically infested with zombies right now, so I think it’s something worth thinking about.

I say secure the levees. Get to high ground.