Not creepy at all!

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Creative Commons License photo credit: Kingfox

An enterprising and holiday-spirited local person wants your childs (sic) name and address, for holiday purposes of course:

So here is how this will work send me two dollars per letter you want sent out (per kid) cash or money order (Just because of the stamps and paper).
Also include the childs name what letter you want sent out and the information you want in the letter. Childs name(s)

I think you might also want to send a recent photo of your child. For Santa.

Hands off

Hudson Sangree’s Bee story today about a shooting downtown in which a jazz musician shot a troublemaker includes this fantastic detail about some of the troublemaking that led to the shooting:

As they exited the building, the men touched one of several human-sized cat figurines belonging to a jazz band that was playing on the patio just outside the restaurant.

Everybody always blames the driver

(Paging SinghCity…) The latest car-v-building incident has all the same details you’ve come to expect from this type of story: a car, a building, the moving one crashes into the stationary one. But this one has a twist… it was the driver’s fault! From KCRA.com:

SUV Hits Sacramento Convenience Store: Driver Error Blamed

Most of the time, the convenience store has it coming, what with all that delicious junk food just sitting there for the crashing.

Your ad here

Clever use of space to advertise
I am sure a billboard for Chili's is coming soon

When Sacramentans are faced with adversity (like the recent economic downturn) they often times know how to make the most of a bad situation. The would-be TGIF restaurant on Truxel Road has been an eye-sore for quite some time. The smart folks at Beach Hut Deli and Sport Clips saw this as an opportunity to promote their business in a high traffic area. Nice work.

I still can’t believe this location hasn’t been torched yet. Er, I mean, something horrible like an accidental fire.

More comedy from the Sac PD

The Sac PD is continuing to put comedy right where it belongs, on the crime blotter. This time it is a press release about a break-in at a medical office building. Could be a pretty serious incident, what with the possibility of stolen medical information and identity theft. The press release is titled This Wasn’t a Scheduled Office Visit.

They’ll be here all week!

Depressing government bureaucracy of the day

The Sacramento County Department of Health and Human Services helpfully allows you to order for informational purposes either a birth certificate or a death certificate using the same form. Merely check the box for the event that has occurred for the individual in question.

Note that it is much cheaper to request a death certificate, which adds insult to injury for us unlucky folks who are requesting birth certificates. Also note that this is in no way intended as a political argument. It is however intended as a call to rent Brazil and contemplate what might happen if you check the wrong box!

What the CLUCK?!

What you are about to hear is truly fowl. You may want to cover your ears. According to the Sac Bee, a local family has been issued a notice by the city to have their unruly chickens removed. Keep in mind, we’re not talking about roosters here, but chickens. According to the story, a neighbor complained about the hens’ raucous “cooing.” The nerve!

I for one would like to create a top ten list of the most horrible ways to wake up in the morning:

10. Oven door shutting, followed by the smell of freshly baked cinnamon rolls
9. Wind chimes tink-tinking
8. Kittens purring
7. Waves lapping the beach
6. Rain drops pattering on the window pane
5. Birds singing
4. Hummingbird humming
3. Water fountain splashing
2. Leaves rustling
1. Chickens cooing

Indeed, I’m sure the disturbed neighbors would rather wake up to my top ten list of the absolute best ways to awake each morning: Continue reading “What the CLUCK?!”